Lost

 How to learn not to feel lost when things are not the way they used to be even a month ago? I am feeling so lonely, so lost. Breathing hurts. I have to learn to not depend on my mood on yangu absence. I don't know what is going on now too. Everything is the same but things trigger me so much. I remember a year ago everything. Every breath, every pain, everyday tears. Everything. I have never let it go. I thought it would not trigger me anymore, I left it behind but for the last three weeks already I keep feeling it and now it's about to explode.

Waking up and hoping yangu is here. Thinking where did I make a mistake. Knowing I don't have to relate on this so much but still feeling so lost, so lonely...

I hope you are happy with having your control back yangu. I all ever wanted is you to be happy and find your calm in this life...